{"product_id":"emotional-support-bandages","title":"Emotional Support Bandages","description":"\u003cdiv class=\"relative basis-auto flex-col -mb-(--composer-overlap-px) pb-(--composer-overlap-px) [--composer-overlap-px:28px] grow flex\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv class=\"flex flex-col text-sm pb-25\"\u003e\n\u003csection data-turn=\"assistant\" data-scroll-anchor=\"true\" data-testid=\"conversation-turn-6\" data-turn-id=\"request-WEB:ed03953c-3ac3-4cb5-a2be-130f1f1f1a22-2\" dir=\"auto\" class=\"text-token-text-primary w-full focus:outline-none [--shadow-height:45px] has-data-writing-block:pointer-events-none has-data-writing-block:-mt-(--shadow-height) has-data-writing-block:pt-(--shadow-height) [\u0026amp;:has([data-writing-block])\u0026gt;*]:pointer-events-auto scroll-mt-[calc(var(--header-height)+min(200px,max(70px,20svh)))]\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv class=\"text-base my-auto mx-auto pb-10 [--thread-content-margin:var(--thread-content-margin-xs,calc(var(--spacing)*4))] @w-sm\/main:[--thread-content-margin:var(--thread-content-margin-sm,calc(var(--spacing)*6))] @w-lg\/main:[--thread-content-margin:var(--thread-content-margin-lg,calc(var(--spacing)*16))] px-(--thread-content-margin)\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv class=\"[--thread-content-max-width:40rem] @w-lg\/main:[--thread-content-max-width:48rem] mx-auto max-w-(--thread-content-max-width) flex-1 group\/turn-messages focus-visible:outline-hidden relative flex w-full min-w-0 flex-col agent-turn\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv class=\"flex max-w-full flex-col gap-4 grow\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv data-turn-start-message=\"true\" class=\"min-h-8 text-message relative flex w-full flex-col items-end gap-2 text-start break-words whitespace-normal outline-none keyboard-focused:focus-ring [.text-message+\u0026amp;]:mt-1\" data-message-model-slug=\"gpt-5-3\" dir=\"auto\" data-message-id=\"5582bcdb-5ea1-48ba-9a50-f1ec853f8b0f\" data-message-author-role=\"assistant\" tabindex=\"0\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv class=\"flex w-full flex-col gap-1 empty:hidden\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv class=\"markdown prose dark:prose-invert w-full wrap-break-word light markdown-new-styling\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"409\" data-start=\"187\"\u003eThis set of 24 hilarious bandages is here to help you patch things up… physically and emotionally. Whether you’ve got a tiny scrape or a full-blown “my ego just got absolutely wrecked” situation, these bandages get it.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"472\" data-start=\"411\"\u003eEach one comes printed with painfully relatable phrases like:\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul data-end=\"826\" data-start=\"473\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"538\" data-start=\"473\" data-section-id=\"1xj9glq\"\u003e\n\u003cem data-end=\"517\" data-start=\"475\"\u003e“It’s fine, I’m fine, Everything is fine.”\u003c\/em\u003e (clearly not fine)\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"604\" data-start=\"539\" data-section-id=\"95gtul\"\u003e\n\u003cem data-end=\"573\" data-start=\"541\"\u003e“It could probably get worse.”\u003c\/em\u003e (comforting?? questionable.)\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"638\" data-start=\"605\" data-section-id=\"b3emu4\"\u003e\n\u003cem data-end=\"629\" data-start=\"607\"\u003e“I just need a hug.”\u003c\/em\u003e (same)\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"718\" data-start=\"639\" data-section-id=\"1nmmmwr\"\u003e\n\u003cem data-end=\"682\" data-start=\"641\"\u003e“The only thing that hurts is my Eago.”\u003c\/em\u003e (spelling intentional, pain real)\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"775\" data-start=\"719\" data-section-id=\"gawyu1\"\u003e\n\u003cem data-end=\"757\" data-start=\"721\"\u003e“Handle with Care, I’m Breakable.”\u003c\/em\u003e (aren’t we all)\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"826\" data-start=\"776\" data-section-id=\"10dbzd2\"\u003e\n\u003cem data-end=\"804\" data-start=\"778\"\u003e“I only cried a little.”\u003c\/em\u003e (define “a little”)\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"887\" data-start=\"828\"\u003eThey’re not just funny—they’re actually legit bandages too:\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul data-end=\"1052\" data-start=\"888\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"947\" data-start=\"888\" data-section-id=\"1wwba8n\"\u003eWater resistant (tears not included, unfortunately)\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"1052\" data-start=\"948\" data-section-id=\"5xk9gg\"\u003eLatex free \u0026amp; hypoallergenic (because your skin deserves better, even if your life choices don’t)\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"1211\" data-start=\"1054\"\u003eAnd it all comes packed in a reusable tin that says:\u003cbr\u003e“Emotional Support Bandages, for when you hurt the most”—which honestly feels a little too accurate.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/section\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e","brand":"Classy Cards Creative","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":45803657298081,"sku":"210000115534","price":14.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":false}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0072\/1432\/files\/classy-cards-creative-personal-care-emotional-support-bandages-funny-gag-gifts-1231281536.webp?v=1775478815","url":"https:\/\/www.offthewagonshop.com\/products\/emotional-support-bandages","provider":"Off the Wagon Shop","version":"1.0","type":"link"}