{"product_id":"ol-bastard-lip-balm","title":"Ol' Bastard Lip Balm","description":"\u003cp\u003eDry lips? Cranky attitude? Meet your new best friend: Ol’ Bastard Lip Balm. This little tube of moisture is perfect for anyone whose personality is 50% sass, 50% chapstick, and 100% done with everyone’s nonsense.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eSmooth, soothing, and just the right amount of grumpy, it’s the lip balm equivalent of yelling “Get off my lawn!” while secretly handing out Werther’s Originals. Toss it in your pocket, slap it on your lips, and embrace your inner lovable curmudgeon.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003ePerfect gag gift for the grouchy, the grizzled, and anyone who insists “they don’t make ‘em like they used to.” Because even old bastards deserve soft lips.👴💋\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Whiskey River Soap Co.","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":45118277288097,"sku":"210000111678","price":5.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":false}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0072\/1432\/files\/whiskey-river-soap-co-personal-care-ol-bastard-lip-balm-funny-gag-gifts-1192602357.jpg?v=1760192185","url":"https:\/\/www.offthewagonshop.com\/products\/ol-bastard-lip-balm","provider":"Off the Wagon Shop","version":"1.0","type":"link"}