{"product_id":"soap-for-too-old-to-care","title":"Soap For Too Old To Care","description":"\u003cp\u003eAt a certain age, you stop sweating the small stuff—mostly because you can’t even \u003cem\u003esee\u003c\/em\u003e the small stuff without your glasses. Enter Soap For Too Old To Care, the sudsy celebration of finally giving zero damns.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eScented like Bengay (yes, really), this bar is equal parts nostalgic and hilarious. It’s the perfect blend of “ahh, my joints feel better” and “don’t bother me, I’m napping.” Lather up and let the world know: you’ve reached peak wisdom, peak sass, and peak IDGAF.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eA gag gift that smells like retirement goals, aching knees, and the sweet relief of not keeping up with TikTok. Because sometimes the cleanest thing you can do is admit you just don’t care anymore.🧼👵👴\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Whiskey River Soap Co.","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":45118290231457,"sku":"210000106534","price":12.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0072\/1432\/files\/whiskey-river-soap-co-personal-care-soap-for-too-old-to-care-funny-gag-gifts-1192602359.jpg?v=1760192079","url":"https:\/\/www.offthewagonshop.com\/products\/soap-for-too-old-to-care","provider":"Off the Wagon Shop","version":"1.0","type":"link"}